A Glasgow nurse has written a heartbreaking poem about her experience of working with coronavirus patients. Sarah Pirie, who works at the Queen Elizabeth University Hospital, left friends and family stunned with her poem that details the trauma being experienced by NHS staff on the frontline. The 30-year-old from Craigton has been a nurse for three and a half years and said writing her feelings down was a form of ‘self-counselling’ to help deal with her work. full article here Tonight I held you, As I fought back the tears, And grieved for your family, That have loved you for years. You became unwell, There was nothing we could do. We watched you through the window And we increased your O2. I called your family, To see if anyone could attend. Your family needed to know That this was the end. But this virus is terrifying, And people are shielding. How can they be there When Covid is so unyielding? I held your hand, I wiped your face, My gloved hand on your skin, As your breathing slows pace. You'd still smile behind your mask, And I'd try smile back. To comfort and reassure you, Is now my one and only task. Your family called To say their goodbyes. We stood with the phone, And listened to their cries. With tears rolling down our faces, Into the masks we all wear. We really wanted to help them And show them we care. We woke you up, So you could hear their voice. We described your actions, We had no other choice. Their words filled with sorrow, Their hearts layed bare. They wanted the time, To show you, they care. You looked peaceful, And smiled at their call. I hope it brought you comfort, Standing there took my all. We deal with death, But not like this, No family allowed, To give one last kiss. But the next family will need us, We will need to do the same. I hope I gave you good care, And I will always remember your name.
0 Comments
In the midst of a very frantic world here's some good news...
💕Barry Jess of Amore Ceremonies has only gone and hit the £1000 target of fundraising for Maggie's Forth Valley 💕 Thanks to all thats donated along the way. Havent had time to donate yet ? Dont worry I'll keep the page live till friday pm so you can still donate no matter what the amount is 💖 https://www.justgiving.com/fundraising/amore-ceremonies-fundraising-for-maggies-forth-valley?fbclid=IwAR0cV2WkPUdhIrhYXY9VgIbraGY-po41XFKx7Pple2EAdjGLVgDntX7LCik Whether you own a cat, dog, horse, rabbit, reptile, or even a pig, there are plenty of ways to have them play a special role in your big day.written by
Attention parents of fur babies: We've compiled some of the most adorable pet wedding ideas so you can incorporate your beloved four-legged BFF into the wedding celebrations. Whether you own a cat, dog, horse, rabbit, reptile, or even a pig, there are plenty of ways to have your animal play a special role in the big day. And these pet wedding photos are all the inspiration you'll need. When considering the following pet wedding ideas, first take into account your pet's personality and whether your venue allows pets on the premises. Many couples choose to have their furry companions present for the "I dos" and reception festivities. Have your dog walk down the aisle with the bridesmaids, or stand with the groomsmen as you say your vows. Your furry friend can even dress for the occasion. Give your pup a bowtie that matches those of the groomsmen, or a little dress so your fur baby can be an honorary flower girl. (Just think about how adorable those pet wedding photos will be.) However, if that isn't an option, consider scheduling an engagement or bridal shoot in the months leading up to the wedding, or taking photos with them during the getting-ready portion of the day. No matter which route you choose to go, notify all of your vendors so they can help you plan ahead and ensure a pet-friendly environment. If your pet can't make it to the big day, don't fret. You can use your relationship with your pet as inspiration for your wedding stationery, décor, favors, cake, and more. Have an illustration of your pup drawn up for your invitations or escort cards. And instead of the standard newlywed wedding cake topper, you can have a replica of your precious pet made to top your confection. The pet wedding ideas are truly endless. From furry flower girls to kitty cocktail napkins, check out some of our favorite pet wedding ideas and photos below. Folloew the link for the full list ... When Margaret Hubl passed away at the age of 89, her funeral became a testament to just how great of a grandmother she was. Margaret was an avid quilter, but it wasn’t merely a hobby of hers – it was her own way of letting her family know just how much she loves them. In honor of her legacy, her children and grandchildren decided to display all the quilts she has ever made at her funeral. They draped her beautiful creations over the back of the church pews as a way to celebrate Margaret and remember her thoughtfulness as the family’s matriarch. “Never did I imagine how many there were,” Christina Tollman, Margaret’s granddaughter, told TODAY. “We covered almost every single pew in that church. I never knew how many she actually made.” The quilts all looked gorgeous, but Margaret created each one of them for a very special reason. Margaret was already a mother of three when her sister-in-law passed away from a tragic accident. With no one left to care for her twins, Margaret and her husband, Henry, decided to take them in. Together, the couple raised all five children in a small three-bedroom home on their farm. Margaret first took up sewing to provide clothes for all her children, but as they grew up and started families of their own, she had to make the little ones something as well. That’s when she got into quilting. She began making them for each grandchild as they graduated from high school. “She wanted us to have something to wrap up and keep warm in when we went away to school,” Christina said. Margaret put a lot of thought into each quilt and who would be receiving it. “When we sat down to go through her things we found this — I call it a pocket notebook. Inside it says whose quilt she was working on, what day she put it in the quilt frame and which day she took it out,” Christina explained. As the years went by, Margaret put more time into making her quilts. Each grandchild received them as a gift on their wedding day. “I actually have three cousins that are not married, and the day of her funeral was the day that they got to see their quilts for the first time,” said Christina. “That was really kind of a neat moment.” Her family decided to display all these quilts during Margaret’s funeral, with each creation serving as a reminder of how much they were loved and how special their grandmother was. “This is the love that Grandma made for each of us. This is what she made for each of us to wrap up in when we hurt,” Christina said. “When we miss her.” Like a warm hug, Margaret’s quilts will continue to give her family comfort during the times when they need it most – even after she’s gone. https://preview.tinyurl.com/wqom2zz First Person is a daily personal piece submitted by readers. Have a story to tell? See our guidelines at tgam.ca/essayguide.
What people don’t understand is the beauty and joy to be found at the end of life. When I tell people I work at a hospice, they often say “that must be so hard.” But my favourite thing is hearing people’s stories, their experiences, their successes, their failures – the things that life has taught them. I love helping them share these stories with their family members. It helps the family members keep their loved one alive in their memories after he or she dies. I had a husband of a resident come in six months after she had died to say that he received a Christmas card from her, written to him while in hospice. He was tearful, but so incredibly grateful for this gift. He said the card helped keep her alive for one last Christmas. Hospice workers encourage conversations about things that want to be said and heard. We create time for families to connect, laugh and cry together. Mostly, we help create a legacy of the resident that will remain with their family. We have helped someone write letters to each of her children. We have sung favourite songs, played favourite games. We have celebrated birthdays, births, marriages, vow renewals. We have rolled people in their beds out onto the patio to sit in the sun. Often, this is their first time outside the four walls of a hospital or bedroom in months. How amazing it is to have such a thoughtfully designed building that can make this possible – feeling the warmth of the sun directly on their skin, hearing the birds chirping from the nearby feeder and breathing in the fresh air. I see how it provides the resident and their family with a sense of normalcy. This is where the best conversations happen. Families can forget, for a moment, about what is to come, and just enjoy the present. Hospice is a place that collects nurses and personal support workers such as me. The emotionally challenging work we do weans out the people who think it’s just a job. You do not just show up for a shift, put in the time, and clock in and out. You are responsible for providing this human being, who has lived a whole life, with the care and dignity they deserve as they finish it. We help ensure that all loose ends are tied. Sometimes, these things are big, such as arranging a visit from a miniature pony that one of our residents used to show. Sometimes they are small, such as staff sitting at the bedside of a resident who doesn’t have any family, holding their hand, so they don’t die alone. I have spent time working in hospitals, in long-term care and in the community as I searched for a place where the work that I did matched my beliefs of patient-centred care and individuality. After my first day at the hospice, I knew I had finally found my match. The loss of the residents we care for like family does not take a big piece of us with them but, rather, fills us with purpose and joy. The work we do gives us so much back that the word “rewarding” doesn’t even scrape the surface. I began working at the hospice in May, 2017. As much as I love the work and what we accomplish, I could never have imagined needing it myself. Shortly after I started, my father was diagnosed with cancer. Soon we were faced with the decision I have seen so many other families struggle with: Do we settle for adequate care in the comfort of our home or do we move to the hospice where we will receive excellent care but in an unfamiliar location? The decision was easy for me, but not so much for my mom. She was afraid that moving him to hospice meant she was giving up her ability to care for her husband. But my mom was relieved to discover that she could still conduct much of the care, even in our facility. She did not have to sacrifice one for the other. With the 24/7 nursing and physician support, Dad – after eight months of suffering from his illness – finally had some peace. During this time of comfort, he was able to give back to us something we will carry with us forever. He called us all in, on his last good day, told us all how much he loved us and reassured us that he never suffered. He was able to leave me with a recording, telling me what our relationship meant to him and that he would be with me through all of the big life events that he would now miss. The hospice isn’t a place where people come to die. It is where they come to live – to live well for the little time they have left. It is a place of celebration, connection, comfort and support. It is a place of safety for the dying and the grieving. Experiencing such care with my father has only fuelled my passion to ensure that as many people as possible can have a similar experience. British singer-songwriter James Blunt is best known for his sentimental heartbreak ballads “You’re Beautiful” and “Goodbye My Lover,” but his latest single “Monsters,” a tribute to his ailing father, is his rawest and most poignant yet. In his devastating new “Monsters” music video, an anguished Blunt, in an extreme close-up reminiscent of Sinead O’Connor’s iconic, one-take “Nothing Compares 2 U” clip, stares down the lens, his eyes welling up with tears, as he sings: “I'm not your son, you're not my father/We're just two grown men saying goodbye… So Daddy, won't you just close your eyes?/Don't be afraid, it's my turn/To chase the monsters away.” Blunt struggles to maintain his composure throughout the first half of video, so much much so that it’s almost uncomfortable to witness. And when the camera finally cuts to a wider shot, it becomes clear why he is so distraught, that he isn’t acting, and that his tears are very real. Sitting stoically beside him is his real-life dad, former cavalry officer Colonel Charles Blount, who is battling stage 4 chronic kidney disease. Last year on Good Morning Britain, Blunt spoke of his father’s serious illness and made a plea to possible organ donors, saying: "I've come on here to ask you what blood group you are. Some things have been going on in my life that I needed to write about. My father has not been very well, actually. He needs a new kidney and a kidney donor. And I've come on here to ask you what blood group you are. If you are an O-positive, I'll take it off you." (Blunt revealed that, sadly, he is not a match.) View photos James Blunt with his father, Charles Blount. (Photo: Atlantic Records) MoreOn the same U.K. morning program, Blunt spoke of the experience of writing “Monsters” after learning of his father’s kidney disease, explaining: "Really that has been an amazing moment, because when you realize your father's mortality, it's a great opportunity to say the things I'd like to say to him.” Fans, particularly those who have lost a parent or who are preparing to say goodbye to a sick parent, have taken to social media to praise the touching video, which went viral after William Shatner tweeted it to his 2.5 million followers. Living with cancer: 'Pre-grieving is important – we talked, cried and laughed with Mum before she died'Most of us think of experiencing grief after a death, not before, which means anticipatory grief is less talked about As part of a new series called Living with cancer, i is sharing people's stories about how the disease affects their life and relationships, both practically and emotionally. Most of us think of grief occurring after a death. But anticipatory grief, or pre-bereavement, the painful emotions we feel before death, is experienced by many people facing the impending loss of a loved one or their own death. But as this experience is spoken about less often, some find it difficult to express the deep pain they are feeling and fail to receive the support they need. Claudia Tanner spoke to Max Cassily, a 28-year-old area manager at Aldi, from Canterbury, Kent, about how he and his family dealt with his mother Nanda's terminal illness at 54. My dear mum was diagnosed with sarcoma, a cancer of the bone and soft tissue, in 2017. She'd shrugged her symptoms off as back pain. She'd had cancer – of the breast – two years earlier and we thought we'd been through it all and it was over, she'd beaten it. But this time around, the doctors told us straight: it was incurable. Our lovely, kind mother was going to die. They said she had three months left. I remember just after we were told the bad news, all four of us – myself, mum, my dad Steve and my sister Ruby who is two years younger than me – all hugging and crying as we sat on a hospital bed. Nand loved the colour pink (Photo: Max Cassily)'We knew we had to embrace this, talk about it, plan for it, cry about it' They say there's five stages of grief – denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. Perhaps because we had dealt with my mum having cancer before and we had already felt all the anger and sadness, we were able to move more quickly to the acceptance stage. It was dad who said to us something along the lines of "We have got to do this, and accept this is happening." We knew we had to embrace this, talk about it, plan for it, cry about it. I remember leaving the hospital, and the daughter of a woman with Alzheimer’s who was in the bed next to my mum hugged us and said she had loved sitting and listening to our conversations. Open attitude about deathLast time it was all about staying positive and helping mum pull through. We knew this time, that approach wouldn't help at all. It was a difficult decision to stop "fighting" her illness, but this was part of the process of accepting what was happening. You may feel angry, mum was too young to go. It wasn't fair. But you are so sharply aware of the fact there is little time to waste. Mum was going to die and we didn't have long. We wanted to cherish the precious time we had left with her and make the most of it. Mum lived 180 miles away from me in Eastbourne, so I arranged with my employers to allow me my two days off a week to be taken together so I could spend quality time with her. We took a really open attitude to talking about death and making practical arrangements. We announced on Facebook and other methods to everyone who knew Nand, as she was know , that she didn't have long left and invited people to come visit our house week in, week out. Mum had been a drama teacher who had spent half her time in Cyprus. People from all over, some she hadn't seen for years, were grateful for the chance to say goodbye. They would apologise for breaking down, and we'd assure them it was okay. It's only human to get upset. We talked with mum about what funeral arrangements she wanted. She wanted to be cremated. She loved pink and was known as "The Pink Lady" due to her hair colour. She wanted a pink casket and a pink hearse. We were able to find the first but not the latter - there mustn't be the demand for them! She didn't wan't the flowers to go to waste and be cremated with her. She requested that everyone take a single stem home with them to enjoy. Video camera to cherish memoriesWe had set up a video camera to record our chats with Mum. This helped with the practical side of remembering her wishes. It also allowed us to cherish the memories she shared. There were plenty of tears, sad ones and happy ones. It was difficult watching her break down and grieve her own death. But there were positives. It was a time to learn more about my mum's past. I knew dad didn't have a great memory so I wanted to take the chance to ask her all about her childhood and upbringing. Mum was 26 when she met dad and he was just 18. It was unusual in those days, and she was the one who dealt with the more adult things - she was the breadwinner who got them their first house. At one point, she looked deep in thought and she turned to me and my sister and she said, "You are all okay, you're all happy aren't you?" She knew Ruby had her boyfriend and child. She told me I was going to marry my girlfriend Nina. To be honest, I hadn't even thought of marriage at that point. But mum, you were right, Nina and I tied the knot earlier this year. Saying goodbye Max finds comfort in watching videos of his mother talking in her final months (Photo: Max Cassily)'Talk about everything. It won't change the fact that someone you love is about to die; but I promise you, it will certainly help' We had lots of trips out, coffees and lunches, until mum got too tired and wanted to stay indoors. The last month was hard watching her struggle for breath. On 27 February 2018, mum was rushed to A&E. She passed away while I was travelling in a desperate rush to get there on time. I remember balling my eyes out while driving, and not wanting to stop as I wanted to get to the rest of my family as quickly as possible. I’d never seen a dead body before. I found it really helped to see Mum's. She looked so peaceful and not in any pain, in stark contrast to the last few months. Over 250 people attended her funeral. We live streamed in on Facebook and thousands watched it from 21 different countries. I found it so comforting to watch back the videos of Mum in the months after her death. I got to see her laughing at jokes, crying at the situation, chatting about her first house that she bought 30 odd years ago. Just seeing how she was in her normal, every day life was lovely. I started a blog about grieving to help other people deal with loss, which can be found here. It can be so easy to go into denial and not face difficult emotions when someone you love is dying. If I can help one person going through the same, that would be great. Talk about everything. It won't change the fact that someone you love is about to die, but I promise you, it will certainly help. I had felt I had to be “the strong one” to help everyone else out. So when someone asked how I was, I’d say “Yep, I’m fine”, when really I wasn’t. So I called a men’s mental health line. It helped to speak to someone I didn't know. Pre-grieving is an absolute emotional rollercoaster. At times you’re going to be frustrated, sad, angry and even happy, and that’s fine. Max's tips when facing a loved one's death Max's blog outlines several pieces of advice:
Solo weddings are on the rise in Japan, where many young women are giving up on settling down
💕 To Celebrate the launch of Amore Ceremonies
Barry Jess Independent Celebrant of Amore Ceremonies is Fundraising for Maggie's Forth Valley 💕 As a local resident and business I realise the invaluable work Maggies Forth Valley carries out and Amore Ceremonies would like to help towards the running of this excellent charity by gifting the fees from our next 5 booked and delivered ceremonies. The ceremonies can be of any kind, I do wedding , renewal of Vows, pets, baby naming, funerals etc , please see Amore Ceremonies for more info www.amoreceremonies.co.uk 💖 Please feel free to add any donations of your own to my just giving page, all donations greatly received 💖 https://www.justgiving.com/…/amore-ceremonies-fundraising-f… Donating through JustGiving is simple, fast and totally secure. Your details are safe with JustGiving - they'll never sell them on or send unwanted emails. Once you donate, they'll send your money directly to the charity. So it's the most efficient way to donate - saving time and cutting costs for the charity. |
Hello, my name is Barry Jess
|